know that you can handle whatever the future has in store for you. know that you have had down times in your life before and that you have recovered from them. know that because of this, you will be able to handle problems in the future. know that because you have pushed through uncertainty in the past –that this will help you push through uncertainty in the future. and because of all of this, you do not have to fear the future. you do not have to waste the present worrying about the future–because you will push through. this should allow you to enjoy the moment more and feel good about what you are doing today –and feel good about where you are in your life at the moment. it is a good moment because you don’t have to worry, you just have to live. your mind will always push you to fear –but you must fight against it and move towards the positive. an easy way to do this, is to look around and see what good you have in your life –and be grateful. remember, you handled the past and you can handle the future the same way. embrace the future and embrace change.
Author: xangst
the gift of love
when someone loves you, you need to be very aware of that fact when you are dealing with them on a daily basis. because they love you, they will allow you to be negative towards them without any consequences. this is a gift they have given you and you cannot abuse this gift of unconditional love. and because you have this gift -this freedom to say what you want without consequences –you must be very careful not to abuse it. to abuse this gift is very easy to do. you see no consequences, so you lash out without thinking –and this just causes you to create habits of not being nice –of putting all of your insecurities on this person –in the form of being mean. this person will always love you and will never leave you. this makes the gift of unconditional love even more fragile. handle this gift with care and do not abuse this gift. if you do, then your loved ones will suffer and in the end –so will you. your life will have less meaning and you will be ashamed of your actions over the years. stop abusing this gift now.
be there for family
we all know that life is a journey. we all know that we ultimately have to take this journey alone–in each of our own minds. this is something we cannot change. the one thing that we can change that will help our lonely journey along is how we act on the outside –what actions do we take? we take action to do the right thing and to provide peace of mind –to know that you have done all that you can do –and that you think it is the right thing to do. this theory is most important when we are talking about family. you must try your hardest to be there for family. you must do what it takes to be with your family in a time of need –when someone is sick or troubled. this will obviously help your family members in their trials –but it will help you even more. to know that you are there for your family in a time of need is one of the greatest feelings in the world. these times that you are there for your family will stand out like shining markers in the long journey of your life. you will know that you did what you needed to do and you will feel more inner peace. this is how you succeed in life–this is how you fulfill your life –this is how you prepare for the end –so that you are ready when your time comes. be there for family and you will know why you are here on earth.
travel to appreciate more
what do you spend your money on? material objects or life experiences? spending your money on life experiences, including traveling, teaches and educates you. when you travel, you do see new things, but what you really see is more of yourself. you have fun traveling and you enjoy all the new experiences. this is good. but what really is good is when you step back in your door at home. it is at that moment that you realize how lucky you are to have the life that you have. you see how others live on your travels and then when you come home, you see again how you live. you then appreciate your life more and reaffirm that you are living the life you should be living –that it is a good life. if you never travel, then you will not be able to appreciate the life you have –you will keep wondering about the green grass on the other side. travel allows you to see the green grass and then come back to even greener grass –your own. you must see the contrast to appreciate what you have. therefore, you must travel to learn, to be educated about yourself and your life. get it?
don’t be sad when they grow up
one of the hardest things in life is to let go of your children and let them fly on their own. but this is the only way you will be happy and they will be happy. when another birthday passes and they get older and older, you have a feeling of sadness. that is ok, that is natural. but you must not wish to keep them young. this will only cause heartache. instead look at how much they have grown and how much your relationship has grown. it will continue to grow and you will learn to love them more and more each year. you do not really want to go back in time and re-live the years when they were young and you were younger. you already did that. now you will have more fun when they are older and you are older –you will experience more interesting experiences and will be able to become much closer to them. you will relish these moments more than the one’s in the past. the older they get, the closer you will become to them –remember this and you will not be sad anymore, you will understand and you will smile. enjoy the fact that they understand you more and you understand them more. this is one of the keys to a happier life. just live it and you will see.
kissing ass part 2
i wrote about this topic in 2010, but now i understand it more. we shouldn’t feel bad about kissing ass – it is part of the natural flow in this world. essentially, everyone has to kiss someone’s ass –even if you are the president of the United States –you still have to kiss ass to get what you want. thus, we should embrace the act of ass-kissing because in order to eventually get what we want or keep what we have, we need to kiss ass. for example, you must kiss your boss’ ass, even if you are the best of friends –you still kiss it a little, so that you each know where the other officially stands. your boss then kisses his/her boss’ ass and so on – all the way to the top. even when you want to tell your boss to “go to hell” – don’t do it –just bite your tongue and keep kissing ass. this is what keeps the world on track. if everyone didn’t bite their tongue a hundred times a year, we would all be living in chaos. the world runs on kissing ass. it has always been this way and will always be this way. get used to it and don’t fight it. just become the best ass kisser and watch your star rise! one day, there will be more people kissing your ass than the asses you have to kiss -but you will always kiss ass. the goal is to kiss less ass as you get older.
never give up
this is part of the Toby Code – “never give up, never quit”. and it is part of a great quote from Harriet Beecher Stowe – “Never give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.”
Stowe’s mindset is the key to success. what i have found that if you keep doing something and you do not stop doing that something, you will eventually find success. but the problem is that so many people, including myself, eventually stop doing that something, especially if they do not find success fast enough. so what happens is you end up with a life full of trying things, but never succeeding or finishing the job. this then leads to long days in your older years full of small bits of regret. sure, these are small bits of regret, so most of the time you will be happy. but, if you really want to go to your grave satisfied, then you need to concentrate on sticking to something until it plays out. this is the hardest thing in the world to do. why would you keep doing something that yields no immediate or quick results? you wouldn’t. 99% of the people in the world would stop doing that something and would move on to their next fancy. but if you do keep pushing yourself to keep doing that something no matter what –even when you can’t see any light at the end of the tunnel -even when you think “why am I still doing this” –then you will be rewarded. you will find out that the journey is really the main part of this whole thing–not the end result. but the real key is to think about the end of Stowe’s quote – “the tide will turn”. when you are ready to give up – don’t. because that will be the moment that the tide will turn and all your efforts will start to be rewarded. this is what every person who has reached their dreams will tell you -just like Stowe has told us and all future generations to come.
when you know, you will know
life can be easy if you live by your gut and instinct. you don’t have to worry as much, knowing that your gut will guide you. the answers to your questions are always there, waiting to be heard and acted upon. but in order to use the gut correctly, you need to be patient. and with patience, you need to understand that life follows a long path –that life is truly a marathon. this is hard to grasp when you are living in the day to day –it is hard to see the big picture –that every choice you make is all part of a grand plan. all that we need to do is prepare for each step of the process and then act upon what the gut says at the moment the gut says to act. if you follow this method – prepare, patience, plan, timing –you will reach your goals and you will know when to act. if you do not follow this method and ignore the gut, then you will never reach the goals you have always dreamed you would reach. following this process is also following your destiny. there is a destiny laid for everyone when they are born, but you have to believe you have a destiny and you have to follow this path of destiny by following the destiny method. by doing so, when you know, you will know.
why chill when you are older?
when i see older people doing very chill activities, like golfing or walking in the middle of the day, i first think why have they stopped pursuing new goals, why are they content not driving themselves to reach higher heights anymore? i don’t get it because i can’t possibly fathom stopping the pursuit of success at every turn. how can one stop everything and stare at the sea for hours. how can one wake up early, eat dinner early and go to bed early? how can one not talk all the time and not drive fast to get to their destination sooner? how can one not be on the phone all the time and stop going at a frantic pace from one event to the next? but then 1 day, when i am frantic in my mid 40s, it all comes to me. they don’t do all this stuff anymore because they don’t have to. life has slowed down, kids have grown up, keeping up with the jones’ doesn’t matter anymore, caring what others think doesn’t matter anymore. they have been there, done that. no need to stress over these trivial things, no need to rush anymore. the only care is living the last years the best that you can. you rushed around like a chicken with your head cut off for 20, 30 years –you are tired, you are done with that, you can now stare at the sea and not feel like you are missing anything, because you are not missing anything. you didn’t want to miss any party at 20, you didn’t want to miss any event at 40, and you didn’t care what you missed at 60. I get it.
life moves very fast
looking back is an interesting hobby –one that develops more and more as the years go by. you can start to analyze the different phases of your life by looking back. you can see that the early years up until 18 are like watching an old movie in your mind. you see yourself playing sports, meeting friends, having birthday parties, going to school, being mean to others, being nice to others, fighting with your parents in the teen years –but mostly having fun with the only stress being school and social settings. then by the 20’s, your life is full of so many events –mostly good times that now seem so long ago and you wonder wow –things seemed to move slow then but now they seem to have happened in a flash. you wonder where the 20’s went and why you did not relish the moment more. the 30’s are also filled with so many events –but you do start to become more aware of your life –where it has been, where it is going, how will you end up, what have you done, what can you still do. you do take in the moment more –but still gone in a flash when you look back on it. by the 40s, the stress starts to build –stress about kids, work, not enough time to complete all your goals. you might find yourself waking up in the middle of the night and having your fears fighting to keep you awake. it is truly a challenging time period where you start to question everything you have done –has it been good enough. i can see how a mid-life crisis can develop if you let your fears get the best of you. you have to fight more than ever to keep your grip on life. get through this time period and more glory will come after. it is so hard for the human mind to get a grip on this whole life thing –to try and grab hold of one brief moment is difficult to do. we can only think this deeply on the subject very briefly –otherwise it will consume you and affect your actions in life. you need to keep on track, keep doing what you are doing –enjoying every moment the best you can –and knowing that some things you cannot control –like life and time seeming to move so fast when you look back on life. it is ok to acknowledge these ideas –but just continue to live the best way you can –without losing your grip too much.